A love affair with silence

Why I changed my entire life.

I recently saw a quote that said:

“I’m a writer because I’m not a talker.”

And that pretty much sums me up as a person.

As a published author, there is a lot of pressure to speak at large-scale public events, hop on an IG live at a moment’s notice or go “improv” when speaking to the crowd.

But if I were to live my perfect life, I would:

• write in solitude for 6-7 hours a day

• drink my herbal tea while watching the sunrise

• see my loved ones for cake and a natter 2-3 times a week

I am someone who enjoys (and thrives in) the silence.

Which is 100% OK.

“Why are you so quiet?”

That’s a question I’ve been asked (and fended off) all my life. It is a commonly known fact that many writers share this temperament (you may be the same!), but cultivating a quiet life is often met with raised eyebrows and derision. Why choose a night in with Charlotte Brontë when you could have TGI Fridays?

I am not the friend you call at 11 pm on a Friday night; I’m the one you invite on a nature hike to share a Thermos of soup. Most people around me always questioned this “peculiar” preference (I went to university in the heyday of Skins after all), but - in 2025 - I believe attitudes are shifting.

With the rise in cases of burnout and the forced return to the office, I think more and more people are craving this kind of quiet life. We’re tired of the hectic commutes. Tired of the neon strip lights. Tired of having to have three coffees each morning just to feel like we fit in with the frantic pull of modern life.

Perhaps now more than ever, the quiet is enticing.

I often find myself inspired by Molly Ella’s writing. She is someone I’ve followed on here for a long time, and I really value her transparency and openness as she recounts her journey into slow, peaceful living. Her post on “Choosing silence over social media” really spoke to me. Here, she shared her “love affair with silence” and the joy she finds in cutting out the meaningless noise in her life.

Over the past few years, I have been actively prioritising rest and softness to counter the burnout I wrote about in my book, The Wheel. I have been cultivating a life that feels true to my quiet essence and who I am as a writer. I’ve embraced my natural traits of thoughtfulness, sensitivity and wanting to give back to the planet, incorporating my needs into every area of my life.

The upshot?

• I’m slightly behind the times on the latest news

• I read 70+ books a year

• You’re more likely to receive 20 jars of jam from me, rather than a birthday gift card

• My clothes are the result of a very uninfluenced life

• You won’t be able to get hold of me past 9 pm

I am by no means perfect in my quest for quiet, nor have I completed even half that journey. But I have set boundaries with myself to prioritise the things I love most.

If this sounds like something you’d like to explore alongside me, here is how I’ve been creating my new life.